The world we live in

[seimei]

Some of us wonder what happens to our childhood, specially when growing up is so hard. At school or even at home, we look at the adults and tend to wonder what they were like when they were younger. It almost seems like we are worlds apart simply because of age, because of gender, or even because of our thoughts. The world doesn’t pay attention to us, and they still expect us to try. Some don’t accept it, some move on, leaving us behind and wondering, how come they were so lucky?
The world has evils that more often overturn the good, we teach the children the stories that bad guys never win, simply because its a light overturning of the world in front of us. It’s even harder to love, when the world is so cruel, and when others see two who have an odd connections its an automatic need to attack them. Even if its trust that is compromised, some just get confused as to what makes sense.

Our sense of judgement is warped by society itself, one thing seems strange, because of the way you were raised. If you were for one moment to switch places with one child or another, you’re view on life would be totally different. I guarantee that everything you know, and have known would change. And maybe once upon a time will become a dark end we all come to in the end. And we make up some sort of story to protect ourselves from the fear. The greatest weakness we have is feelings, and in the end if we don’t feel, it makes an even greater task to even get up in the morning.

I have only been alive for sixteen years, and already I know what the world is about. And I try my best to open up, I try my best to leave others be, because I don’t know their story. What if they come to some sort of circumstances, that made them who they are. And all the time I pity them, I feel as if I should help, and yet here I stand saying I would give up my own child if it meant I could be with the one I loved forever. I don’t know what it is, but what makes me so different.

I want to be different from the world, I want to be forgiving, and I want to be caring, but still be strong enough to show everyone even if the world does treat you like crap you won’t lose until you give up. And you should never give up, it is never worth it. What you see in front of you is what you know, what you believe is what you feel. And if you throw it behind, there is always the one person who is affected. Even if years later, there will be someone looking at your face, until finally we feel the weight of it all around us. And I will be the one to support you if you need it, even if a stranger. It’s only the small things I can do.

I will never be done learning, but I know the things I feel, and the things I know right now are real. I can be conflicted, I can’t at the same time. I am a lover, and I am a friend when I need to be. But one thing I know is everyone has a story, and if they value the life of other human beings, than that is reason enough for me to forgive them for whatever they have done if they learn from it. Call me a fool, call me a loser for risking my life for an animal, for a pet. Call me a fool for sharing everything and wanting my partner to know every detail inside of my brain. Even the things we hate come into the air. And when it comes down to it, I would give up all my things in an instant for my lover. Friends family, even my heart. If it meant her happiness.

This is the world we live in, it is dangerously violent, and quickly cruel. But I’ll stay optimistic, because I won’t let it drag me down. I will always think that I have a future, from minutes to seconds in front of me. I am alive, I am breathing, and hurting, is only a fun way of knowing that I’m still feeling.